July 2009
Comments from July
Confessions of a brand new feminist, by Anna Corbett
From Bea
Judging from the quality of your article you are also an excellent writer. Keep it up!
From Wisrutta Atthakor
Great article! It's great to see people aged 22 proclaiming that they're feminists! I have always considered myself a feminist, but it wasn't always so easy to admit it openly, especially when I was younger. When I was at school I told people I was a feminist and was met with a barrage of hostile reactions towards my feminism - they had the same negative attitudes towards feminism that you mention in your article. As a result, I had kept quiet about it for over ten years - only in the past few years have I been brave enough to confidently express myself as a feminist again.
You, and people like you, are really important for young feminists today! Keep on challenging people's misguided attitudes and notions about feminism and feminists!
From Janis
Hear! Hear! Anna. Thank you for sharing that, it is easy to despair of women who think we have it all, because that is so far from the truth. I agree very strongly with your observation about how women often are feminists without realising it. I have had conversations (astoundingly) with women my own age who feel that a married woman should be addressed by her husband's full name. (They don't seem to ever address the same question as it applies to same gender couples.) But I've never come across a women who thought we should lose the vote. (Thank goodness). I recently read the book 'Reading Lolita in Tehran', whose author, Azar Nafisi, discusses how her mother's generation had the same levels of freedom as western women, yet her daughter had almost no freedom at all. How swiftly it can all vanish if we don't continue to fight for it - and in Nafisi's case, the women of Iran DID continue to fight for it and it was still taken away.
From tom hulley
Sometimes I regret that old lessons must be re-learned and old struggles re-fought. As a friend of sixties feminism I have been disappointed by its dismissal by so many women.
Anna you have made my day.
I realise that young people need to learn for themselves and not be spoon-fed by the previous generation. When you turned to Simone de Beauvoir and others, you were making your own choice and your own sense of history. You were also using the past to give a new meaning to the present.
What is encouraging is that people like you will remake feminism as a vibrant and active dialogue with present concerns.
Your article was more than welcome ...the modern world needs as many Annas as there are stars in the sky. Their messages may differ but will, I hope, focus first on the collective interests of women as you did and as feminism has always intended (which its detractors have always tried to undermine).
Thank you for a lovely, clear, honest and important piece of writing.
From Amity
Brava, Anna! You expressed the feminist-within realisation (mine was very similar and at about the same age) so articulately and wonderfully. Even a few years later, I am still voraciously devouring feminist material and engaging in feminist discourse with others in my quest to recognise, address and fight for an end to gender discrimination and institutional sexism. Enjoy the journey!
From Josie
Welcome! I loved your article and your excitement and enthusiasm came shining through every line. I also agree fully with your idea about convincing other women that they are already feminists by asking them if they believe in things like equal pay, rights over your own body etc.
There's still a lot of misconceptions that feminism is about female supremacy, man-hating and body hair and it's downright sad, so good for you for de-bunking the ridiculous myths.
It's very thrilling feeling your consciousness go 'ping' and seeing the world through very different eyes for the first time so thank you for sharing your story and enjoy your new-found awareness!
From earwicga
As happy as I am Anna that you have experienced this ephiphany, I must point out the basic fact that raising children is in fact WORK and in my view the hardest work I have ever done. Perhaps you could find a minute to think about the term "paid employment" to refer to what you call "work".
From Kate_L
I would just like to say that I was heartened to read this article. Thank you very much for sharing your experience.
I studied what was a kind of feminist history of womankind throughout the ages for my history A level at school, and having gone to an all girls Grammar (this was in the late 90s, early 2000s), it seemed to have little relevance. I assume this was because I had a very liberal upbringing, where talent mattered, regardless of gender and then to be ensconced in an all girls school, full of very bright people.... well, surely the feminists had not only attained but also surpassed their goals! No-one expected me to be chained to the kitchen....
And then I made it out of school, into the big bad world of work and University - suddenly, all that irrelevant women's history seems very appropriate indeed. I also learned of literary feminism, through my English degree and a convert, like yourself, was born.
Even among (some, certainly not all) enlightened female friends, when I talk about the conflict between, for example, my feminist principles and the societal inculcation that anything but ultra thin is bad, I tend to get sniggered at. My point being that it is not in line with my feminist principles to diet to obtain a body perceived as appropriate by society, the media etc, when I know that is it not, in fact, appropriate or desirable.
However, perhaps I'll send this article their way, and see if I can get them thinking too.
Anna Corbett, author of the article, replies
You are, of course, entirely right and I apologise for my careless wording. As you say it should indeed read "paid employment" and I was in no way trying to insinuating that raising children is less work than employment outside the home. In fact I was trying to express the opposite opinion and that I believe that those who chose to stay at home should be treated with equal respect that those who chose (or are compelled by economic restraints) to engage in paid employment. I shall rectify my language in the future.
From Cimen Ekici
I think this article highlights an extremely important phenomenon which warrants further discussion. I am convinced that the word itself maybe forming a barrier against recruiting more young women to the cause. (Also interesting to note that this website is called the 'f-word'). Perhaps it is time to re-brand and start calling ourselves 'equalists'?
Jess McCabe, editor of The F-Word, replies
Although on the face of it, adopting a new name for the moment sounds appealing, I think that the backlash would not stop if 'equalists' or some other name came into use. The fact of the matter is, the same people would continue backlashing, as it were, because it's the ideas themselves which provoke that reaction, not the name... Feminism 101 summarises the arguments on this quite well.
From me
This is a great and inspiring article especially for women your age, but of course most readers of this blog already agree with you. How about trying to get it published on a newspaper or women's (or girl's) magazine's web site or?
From Joanna
Go comrade!! I think it's great that you've started thinking more about such important and relevant issues. Who knows? Maybe your conversation with the anti-feminists struck a chord... here's hoping! From one feminist, to another...
From Caitlin
The conversation you had with your friends entirely echoes the one I've had many times with my boyfriend, now husband. He believes in equal rights for men and women - I believe that makes him a feminist, while he does not. Oh well. It's frustrating but at least he believes in the right things.
The woman engineer: are we really that incompetent? by Wisrutta Atthakor
From Clare
Great to see this article. I'm an engineer and an anarcha-feminist and I've been looking into this area for some time.
I attempted (semi-successfully) to get a edition of the Engineers Journal (the magazine of Engineers Ireland, Ireland's professional institution for engineers) to focus on women in engineering. There was a mixed response and I could write a thesis about the experience. I'd encourage others to try this - I convinced the editor to use the March issue of the journal of this to mark International Women's Day. In the end, it was almost a struggle to get the editor to include a sentence stating that 9% of the members of Engineers Ireland are women - it wasn't opinion, it wasn't radical conjecture, it was a fact!! I included articles about WITS (Women in Technology and Science) an Irish organisation and WAVES (Women - a voice in engineering society) a student organisation in DIT that helps women studying Engineering in a very much male dominated college and also a technical paper included which was written by a woman. It ended up all quite tokenistic but interesting all the same.
Anyway, I'm also currently working on an article on "Women and girls in SET" for The Rag no.4 which is due out in Autumn 2009 (see www.ragdublin.blogspot.com).
I am particularly interested in the experiences of women engineers in the work place. There is a blog I found which is always interesting to read - http://scientiae-carnival.blogspot.com/ but very often this contains submissions from women working in academic settings rather than the typical office/site workplace.
I'd welcome any comments or help on people's experiences and ideas.
From TDevine
I am so glad I stumbled across this article! I've found it fits to my field as well. I'm a college student, studying to become a thoracic surgeon. When I was little, I kept switching from wanting to be a doctor to a genetic engineer. Over the years though, I became unsure if I was able to, because I kept hearing/seeing that women were unable to stomach gruesome things like blood and opened bodies.
Slowly I became convinced that I wasn't the iron-stomached tomboy I thought I was. Instead, I started to believe I was a "normal" woman. One wanted to be a wife and went faint at the thought of dissecting things. I even opted out of dissections in Biology.
Thankfully, I got into Anatomy class in high school and fell head over heels in love with it. After winning an award for my skills in the class, I started thinking about how I used to be and snapped back to my senses.
Now I'm back on track, more determined than ever and proud of my tomboy-ish ways.
Though I still get asked if I'm sure I don't want to "just be a nurse?"
From Jennifer Drew
Excellent article which very neatly challenges what passes for 'commonsense' views concerning women's and girls' supposed innate ineptitude with regards to what is misogynistically termed 'masculine science.'
A number of feminist experts on education have researched in detail how girls and boys learn at school. Their findings are that boys are encouraged to explore and examine how technology works; how computers work and even what is the relevance of science. Girls however, are strongly encouraged to focus solely on 'feminine' subjects such as English, literature or history.
But truth is all these subjects are important but the most important criteria for any girl or boy is to have an adult around who encourages them in whatever subject(s) they are intensely interested in. Subjects are simply subjects they are not 'gendered' but our male-dominant society believes certain subjects are 'masculine' whereas others are 'feminine.'
The educational system is still highly gendered and promotes a rigid divide between 'masculine and feminine subjects.' An excellent book entitled Failing at Fairness written by two expert educationalists details just how girls continue to be short-changed by our misogynistic society.
Women are excellent engineers but unlike men they achieved their ambition, despite being told 'but engineering is masculine subject and not suitable for you.' I've lost count of the number of women engineers and women architects I've interviewed in the course of my work as a social researcher. Yet still our society refuses to accept women and men are both from earth - not venus or mars.
Not all men are interested in 'masculine subjects' and not all women are interested in 'feminine subjects' and the reason is because we are all diverse human beings. Being born female does not mean the baby already has so-called innate 'feminine' traits - rather from the minute she is born the female child is subjected to a never-ending barrage of 'you can't do this or that because you're a girl.' Whereas boy babies from the minute they are born they are expected to be more interested in exploring and discovering the world. Boys are also subjected to a barrage of messages but these are positive ones emphasising how clever the boy child is and how when he is older he will be an engineer or a scientist. Okay so not all males are interested in science but if one believes the media and society, boys supposedly have this innate interest in science and if they don't they are effeminate.
Such rigid reinforcement of narrow gender roles negatively affects our society because far too many bright and intelligent young women and girls do not achieve their full potential but instead due to constant negative messages believe they cannot become engineers or scientists. This is a waste of a huge amount of talent and skills due solely to the myth that boys and girls have different brains and both sexes are supposedly innately interested in either 'feminine or masculine subjects' not a mixture of both.
From An engineer who happens to be femail
The lack of women in SET is cultural and current western cultural attitudes are making it harder for women to move into engineering; one could argue harder than 20 years ago. In some south eastern asian countries (?Malaysia comes to mind, but I could be wrong), the number of students studing computer science is dominated by women, not men. Yet in the west, it is overwhelmingly white males. We need more articles like this that point out the cultural bias and the fallacy in the arguments. Keep it up.
From Karen
Hi Wisrutta, as a female motor vehicle/mech/elec engineer, i raise my hat to you for an excellent article about the challenges still being placed before potential female SET workers. The idiots I went to college with just didnt know how to deal with having a woman on their course so they dealt with it in the usual way, pornos left on my desk, telling me they would rather have a model there than me so there was "something nice to look at" and general crap. I wiped the floor with them and that really pissed them off. This plus the crap I was dealing with at home gave me such an inferiority complex that my apprenticeship was a nightmare. I was too frightened to touch anything in case I broke it because of how low my self-esteem had sunk. But I got there and I just want to say that if any other would-be scientists and engineers of whatever discipline are reading this, please dont give up. Thats what they want. Are you really going to let idiots like that make your life's decisions for you. You get there in the end, there may well be heartache but it is worth it in the end. Because of how much I had to cope with, I won the British apprentice of the year 19-24 age group in 2004. I beat 20,000 other applicants, mostly men, from all walks of life and I still think how I may not have made something good like that come out of my life, just because a bunch of male teenagers (and my father) didnt like me. Ladies, get stuck in, stand up and be counted!
Wisrutta Atthakor, author of the article, replies
Karen, congratulations on winning the Apprentice of the Year award! It is certainly a huge achievement and one that just goes to show that it really is possible for women to excel in SET. I never had any doubts, of course, but it's the changing of archaic views and especially the hostilities that women have to put up with in male-dominated work places that does, I must admit, sometimes make me feel somewhat despondent. I mean, you shouldn't have had to be expected to 'laugh off' insulting jokes and attitudes and no one should have to be. But when I hear of all the success stories, they really do remind me that it's definitely worth fighting for.
From bex
This is a great article, thank you. I am a female sound engineer, and almost all of my peers are men. I was lucky enough to go to a school (all-girls, incidentally) where I was instilled with the belief that I could be whatever I wanted, be that an engineer, writer, chef, astronaut - literally anything - if I was prepared to put the hours in. I think this is the message that we should be sending to girls and young women everywhere - it's certainly what I try to pass on to my two stepdaughters. I do think that men and women are different, but that this simply means that we have different things to bring to any given profession, and I've also found the different approaches employed by myself and my male colleagues to be interesting and mutually beneficial. We're at our best when we work together and play to our individual strengths!
From Melusine
I thought this was a great article, but noticed one mistake: research actually shows that women (on average) outperform men on tasks involving manual dexterity and fine motor coordination. (Logically, this should result in arguments that that men are rubbish at surgery and it should be dominated by women, but strangely anti-feminists don't seem to think this way...)
Wisrutta Atthakor, author of the article, replies
Melusine, perhaps you could point me in the direction of the research you mention. I would be very interested indeed! Next time someone tries to tell me that men are better at these things, I'll actually be able to back up my argument. Also, the mistake you say - I would disagree that it is a mistake per se. In my article, I did not point towards any studies or research claiming that men were actually better than women at manual dexterity and fine motor coordination. I based my article on the general perception that a lot of people have, sans any evidence from any research. Therefore, it is not actually a mistake. It is merely what I hear 'on the street', as it were. But thanks for bringing up existing research and, like I mentioned, I would be extremely interested to see this piece of research for myself.
From Josie
Excellent article Wisrutta! I am an early years professional and am frequently horrified by comments made by parents AND other professionals re children's gender. I'm sure we've all heard examples - 'she's a typical girl, loves dollies', 'he loves his bike, he's a typical boy'. I just want to scream 'NO NO NO!' but have started offering a slightly more rational response instead, usually just something as simple as 'oh you know, some girls love bikes too' or whatever, but I like to tell myself that it gets people thinking.
I usually offer children stickers as rewards for completing tasks and always make a point of offering flower stickers AND star stickers to both boys and girls. I have had a few disturbing comments from parents - one little boy picked a pink flower sticker and his mum said to me 'I worry about him sometimes!'. I wish parents could realise that they are not only pigeon-holing their own child and possibly restricting their potential as a result, but that these rigid gender rules sow the seeds of homophobia, sexism and bigotry in general. It's a very important issue and as feminists it's important that we challenge these dangerous and restrictive assumptions whenever we can
From headey
Some years ago I lived in Indonesia. An Indonesian friend complained that shop assistants used to try to speak to her in English. "Why? I'm Indonesian." she would say, to their bemusement.
Then, one day, I caught a glimpse of her walking down the street and realised she didn't walk like a local. She'd been raised in Tokyo and the USA and walked like most Westerners.
So, what has this to do with women engineers? Simple. If something as nebulous as ones gait is picked up - without anyone actually saying anything to you - to the point that your whole identity can be questioned.
Clearly, children absorb a huge amount simply be looking and being. Never mind the comments well meaning parents, aunts, uncles and friends might say. The idea that girls are being put off science and engineering should come as no surprise to anyone walking the aisles of a toy shop. The sooner schools, toy manufacturers and society as a whole allows itself to nurture curiosity in children, irrespective of sex, the quicker we shall progress and - perhaps - mature as a species.
From Frances
I think all the things you've said are true. Regarding children's toys, I definitely think they encourage different behaviour for different genders - although that didn't stop me from stealing the clothes from my brother's action man to create action barbie and also didn't stop my brother from stealing my doll to play daddy I still think its important that children aren't made to feel guilty for being interested in things not associated with their gender. My parents encouraged it and bought my brother a toy vacuum cleaner for his fourth birthday!
From Geraldine O'Donnell
Reading this has resonated with me as I've recently been thinking about feminist parenting. My fiance and I want to start a family soon, and my one of my dearest wishes for my futre children is that they have choices and are able to think critically about the world around them and the messages it sends them. One book that has been useful in encouraging me to think more about this is "Packaging Girlhood" by Lamb & Brown.
I was a little girl who loved to learn (which bemused my parents), who asked many question about everything (too many, I was told), and loved to tinker, to find out how things worked. Lots of these aspects of my personality were subtly discouraged, yet my liking for dolls, making clothes and painting pictures were praised and rewarded. I received the package of 'girlhood' from my parents, playmates, teachers, and those girls on tv who I soon learned to admire.
As it happens, I am happy with the way things turned out, but I will never forget that I was guided away from some of my interests purely because they were perceived as "not for girls." I am a geographer now, and incredibly happy with it, but I could have been an engineer, I could have been a scientist, had those options not been closed off to me.
I want to raise children without this type of exclusion, even though I know that they are likely to feel it from the rest of society. I just want to give my future little girls and my future little boys the opportunity to grow into whoever it is they want to be, to pursue their interests, to learn without gender boundaries. I never want them to mourn the little girl inside who loved to build things.
Wisrutta Atthakor, author of the article, replies
You're so right about wanting to give your children opportunities and letting them have the choices to make, although I can imagine how difficult it must be when they're getting strong negative messages from elsewhere. I'm not a mother myself, but reading some of the posts about the difficulties some parents face being feminist parents makes me rather dread the prospect of one day becoming one.
I wonder, as well, whether gender differentiation when it comes to toys has somehow become worse in the last couple of decades. I mean, the difference between 1981, as seen in Jess McCabe's post and in Laura Woodhouse post seems startling!
From Caitlin
Well said! I had LEGO as a child and I loved it! There was never any sense in my household that LEGO was a boy's toy and when my male cousin, age 3, asked for his own Barbie doll (he liked mine), he got one. I never had Meccano though, which may have been even better than LEGO in terms of learning mechanics and practical physics.
It's great that you've never experienced any differentiation between sexes when it comes to toys; if only all households were like yours! And yes, Meccano is also great when it comes to training the young minds.
The Politics of Breastfeeding, a review by Karen Gregory
From Kalista
I'm so glad that you wrote the book about The Politics of Breastfeeding. I so wish that many more people breastfed. I have breastfed all 5 of my children, and don't regret it a single bit!!!!
They are great and I have always and will always be an advocate of breastfeeding. God made cow's milk for baby cows, He made beans to be eaten, and he made mother's milk for their precious babies!
From Jane
As a mother who was not able to breastfeed, I thought this article was excellent, well balanced, well researched, and without the condescending attitude that is sadly often prevalent towards bottle feeding mothers. The phrase about 'telling us breast is best but then letting us get on with it' really struck home. It's all very well being bombarded with leaflets on how important breastfeeding is, but a new mother needs a lot more than an overstretched midwife jamming her nipple against a fretting baby's mouth. I found breastfeeing painful and nobody ever explained why my right breast was only producing a dribble! I tried a breast pump but nothing got the supply going and so after six weeks of struggle I gave up. Gentle non pressured support might have made a difference.
Having said that I also feel strongly that mothers should support each other and not engage in competitive parenting. There's enough of that nonsense around already.
From Ruth Moss
Brilliant review of an excellent book. I just hope the commenters are kind to you and you don't get the usual "breastfeeding nazi" jibes that often get shouted about when anyone dares to open their mouth and suggest that formula milk is not the equal of breast milk.
Karen Gregory, author of the article, replies
Thank you very much for your comment on the review of 'The Politics of Breastfeeding.' I'm glad you enjoyed it. I do think it is a shame when the debate gets dragged down to hurling insults at each other rather than supporting women in their choices. I have to say all the comments on the article have been very positive so far!
From Lisa
The UK is particularly unsupportive of breastfeeding mothers - much of the training, products and cultural support available to mothers in Germany (for example) is unheard of in the UK.
One small but very, very useful product is St John's Wort oil. It is red and midwives in Germany put it on the ante-natal list for pregnant women to start massaging it into nipples and it is applied post-natally before and after feeding to prevent sore/cracked nipples and boy does it work ! This 'problem' (unnecessary and artificially created as it is) doesn't really exist in Germany.
There are many other examples so it is sad that women in the UK are kept in the dark - maybe somebody should translate some of the German literature and import some of the products ?
Karen Gregory, author of the article, replies
That's interesting about the support in Germany. I've not heard of St John's Wort being used to help prevent sore nipples. Interestingly, Gabrielle Palmer argues in the book that it should not be necessary to treat the nipples with anything as sore nipples are almost always the result of problems like incorrect latch and positioning or practices like limiting time at the breast. On saying that I have to say I found Lasinoh a God-send and used it for many weeks until my daughter's tongue tie was sorted out.
From Jo White
I breast-fed both my babies for 8 and 11 months. Both times I had thrush on my nipples for the first 10 weeks, was like having my nipples hacked off with a rusty saw throughout each feed. I got very depressed as I couldn't go out as the pain was too severe and I would cry during the feeds. I look back now and see it as the hardest time of my life, and my greatest achievement was to continue despite the agony. When the thrush went it was a totally different experience, beautiful and bonding...I shudder to think that I would never have got to that point.
Support for helping me through the thrush was limited. There was one breastfeeding councillor in my area with a week's waiting list, which seemed like an eternity at the time, I remember begging with the receptionist to please let me see her earlier as I was in so much pain. There is only one antibiotic which can help clear thrush, and I was lucky to have an understanding doctor to prescribe this as many friends were told by their doctors that they would not prescribe it. My breakthrough came when I paid £150 to a breastfeeding expert to come to my house and help, within 15 minutes she retaught me how to feed in a way that would limit the pain....the relief was overwhelming. I was lucky that we could afford this, and my heart goes out to anyone who is suffering with this.
There is little info about thrush in the antenatal or postnatal classes. If you google it you can see how many forums there are for women crying out for advice and help.
There is also little research into thrush, something which I believe needs to change as it is one of the main causes of pain and therefore leads to women stopping breastfeeding.
I finished breast feeding last month, it was very emotional as there will probably be no more babies. Those two thrush episodes remain my darkest hours, I used to curl up into a ball and just wail between feeds as I was dreading the next feed.
I look forward to reading this book.
Karen Gregory, author of the article, replies
I am really sorry to hear what a tough time you had and can only sympathise. There are so many people who really suffer because of the lack of support out there. I think you are right about more research into thrush. I know of many women who have had this problem and have had real problems getting the right treatment (GPs who won't treat the baby and mum at the same time, or treat with the wrong thing, etc). I was in a similar position to you in that I had to contact a lactation specialist to get the help I needed in the end. We were lucky that she let us travel to her NHS clinic which was really against the rules to have my daughter's tongue tie treated.
It's such a shame that the early weeks and even months can be so marred by difficulties with breastfeeding. It is so needless. I'm glad you were able to get to the point where you enjoyed all the positive aspects of breastfeeding.
Calendar girls, by Molly Lavender
From Kati
While I've been never seen a "cock of the month" calendar in the UK, they seem to be readily available in Italy. Although it's interesting to note that all the penises on display are from either works of art or archaeological finds. I'm torn on whether this is a double-standard... are male genitalia only considered an acceptable subject for calendars if they have some artistic merit?
Comment's on older features and reviews
Embarrassing Teenage Bodies advocates cosmetic labiaplasty, a review by Bellavita
From Laura
thankyou so much i to watched the channel 4 show about enlarged labia i never had a problem with how mine looked until i watched that show i was bigger than the girl on their and ever since i was looking for cosmetic surgery for my self even though it didnt bother me or my partner of 5 years before it certianlly crushed my confidence after since finding your article on the internet i now realise i am not abnormal down below and will not be persuing surgery
From steph
I came across you article on labioplastery while researching this form of surgery. I had NO idea i was different and wasnt in the slightest bothered about it untill i saw that episode on embarrising illnesses. i was watching it with my boyfriend and was litrally embaressed because I felt i should have already known how 'awful' i looked. Ever since i have been completely embaressed, paranoid and sometimes i feel extremely down. After reading your article and the comments you posted i realised i am not alone. Thankyou so much for posting this article, now instead of wanting the surgery i want to make other women who have felt the same realise it is normal, and to NEVER let anybody make you want to change who you are. Or a poxy television programme thats for sure.
From Charlotte
in response to bellavita's article on embarrassing teenage bodies, i feel she is being very ignorant of the psychological effects that an "abnormal" vagina has to a woman. like it or not, we all have our own ideas of what is normal and when we do not feel that we are it can be very distressing. i have this problem myself and it has caused me so much pain, very little physically but the impact on my sex life is huge. if i had the money, i would have surgery. lots of women out there are probably as diguisted by themselves as i am, and if surgery can bring them confidence and peace of mind then they should be made aware of this option.
From Anon
thank you for your very honest and much-needed article in these post-feminist times. I too am a woman with larger labia than shown on the Embarrassing Bodies programme - and until now thought my body was 'normal'. No boyfriend has ever commented on my anatomy and the only problem I've really encountered is not being able to pee in a straight line! And yes I sometimes have to part my labia for sex but I thought that was part of the fun. After this programme and with my labia I think getting bigger as I get older, I suddenly start to think maybe I should do something - but why? What is the difference between labiaplasty and other cosmetic surgery? None. Just as noses are different sizes then so too are other parts of our anatomy. I guess it would be better to carry on in blissful ignorance of my 'difference' or better still embrace it. Think rose petals not beef curtains!
A 41 year old unrepentant feminist
From LT
What a fantastic article regarding the channel 4 programme \'Embarassing Teenage Bodies\' and the way in which the 19 year old girl who was self-conscious about her labia was handled. I too was appalled by this, and as a 19 year old with slightly larger labia myself, I found it disgusting that a healthy and normal girl like her was instructed that mutilating herself was the only answer. Larger inner labia are not a problem, and referring to them as such can only diminish the confidence of perfectly normal girls such as myself.
I totally agree that this was a terribly bad judgement on the part of the programme makers, and it seriously upsets me that so many other young women have been filled with unfounded paranoia because of it. I wish you the best of luck with your complaint and I hope you get a reply.
From Louise
I Watched This Programme And I Have Protruding Labia Too. It's Now Made Me Think There's Something Very Wrong And I Am Too Considering Surgery Now.
Time to end parental leave discrimination, by Jennifer Gray
From Zoe Bremer
The European Commission took advice from a group of obstetricians about maternity leave. Their opinion was that maternity leave should be distinguished from parental leave and consist solely of sick leave. Parental leave should be available to either parent or a "nominated third party" e.g. the mother's husband if he is not the father, or the baby's grandparent. Since we already have Statutory Sick Pay and, for those not entitled to it, Incapacity Benefit, why bother with maternity pay at all? No obstetrician is going to begrudge a patient a couple of weeks off work (as this group of doctors recommended - they saw no reason to give women time off during pregnancy). If we switched to SSP only, the issue of parental leave could be negotiated separately, without reference to the sex of the person taking the leave.
Of course, we also need to address the issue of why any government in a grossly overcrowded country such as this should have any policy that effectively pays people to breed. This is an environmental issue that no one appears to want to address.
Jess McCabe, editor of The F-Word, replies
Erm, a couple of obvious points: giving birth and bringing up a child is not the same as being ill. And maternity leave isn't "paying people to breed", it's recognising that new parents need financial support.
Kink 101, by Kit Roskelly
From Chiara E
Thank you so much! I have always had an overwhelming feeling of guilt for considering myself a feminist through and through while being very into sexual submission. So many (very well-argued) anti articles have left me feeling terribly uncomfortable about my sexuality. This was a breath of fresh air and very reassuring. After all, feminism is about choice.
Some body to love, by Lara Williams
From Nicola
I'd just like to say 'Bravo!' to Lara Williams for her 'Some Body to Love' article.
I felt so liberated when I hit my thirties and I realised that my entire worth wasn't bound up in my dress size! Nights out with friends was about who looked the best and who was the thinnest and sometimes I would bail out if I didn't feel I looked good enough. Now I remember that I've been invited becuase I'm funny and always have something interesting to say, and I encourage other women I know to recognise this.
Piercing the whitening silence, by Terese Jonsson
From Alice Onwordi
In response to the March article "whose feminism is it?" I think feminism still has to reach out to men as well, of all races and socio economic groups. They are still predominantly in the most powerful positions in society.
Stink bombing the beauty pagaent, by Sarah Levack
From Nina Mega
way to go! good work:)
From nick
I 'd like your thoughts please....
I worked at the Miss Wales contest last weekend...and there was a Mr Wales contest too.
I dont think there were any protests outside the venue ...but would feminists protest against the Miss Wales contest only...and not the Mr Wales ? The Mr.Wales contestants had to do a 'swimwear' section ...the ladies did not ...........is that not wrong too ????
Losing my hijab, by Ala Abbas
From Farah
That was a very interesting article. I hope whenever you started wearing hijab your parents had told you that youre doing this because it is a requirement in Islam not because of "culture or tradition". Surah Azab and Surah Nur clearly explain how Hijab is a requirement... I feel like your article mixed wearing a hijab/being covered with women being oppressed, however that is not that case. Islam does not 'degrade' women by requiring them to cover...that has no relationship. Anyhow, great presentation of your point of view! I enjoyed reading the article. May Allah bless you!
Britney Spears, daddy's little girl? by Cila Warncke
From Polly styrene
Not being an avid Britney Spears fan, I, like most people was unaware of her legal situation. How can an adult be placed permanently in the guardianship of anyone? I mean obviously it HAS happened and is possible under US law, but WTF?
I think the point is that, even if Britney Spear's father is a complete saint, the fact that this can happen at all is an appalling abuse of human rights. Mind you, it is from the nation that brought us Guantanamo bay.
For the good of the species? by Eirwen-Jane Pierrot
From Fay
I agree with most of what's been said in this piece. I just want to suggest that maybe it's not so much the scientists who are at fault here, as the media for the way they seize on 'science' stories and then re-write them to appeal to their readers. Just a possibility, but then again I don't know where you found this article.
(And yes, I've also known those very arrogant and condescending science students, thankfully some professional scientists seem to have grown up a bit since their undergraduate days.)
Enough with the pendulum! by Catherine Redfern
From sianmarie
love this article! it's so simple, and if we all work together we can really affect real change.
i spent a weekend with my brother recently and everytime there was an ad or a moment on tv that was sexist towards men, he jumped up and pointed it out to me, as proof that "the pendulum" (although he didn't use that term) had swung the other way. but he didn't notice any of the sexist towards women ads. i think this is really an issue of privilege. i try really hard now to notice when ads are sexist towards men, because i don't experience directly that kind of sexism myself, just as i am learning to try harder and harder to spot ads etc that are racist/disablist/ageist/transphobic so i can recognise where my privilieges are, and where discrimination is existing.
i am always really shocked by the pendulum argument anyway, as it so completely disregards the global issue. we don't have equality in the uk, but we certainly don't have equality in the world. when men say they are the underdog, i just want to point them in the direction of the rest of the world, where so often women suffer such horrendous discrmination. notice your priviliege!
the comments about radical feminism are really interesting. i wrote an article about andrea dworkin, and i came to the eventual conclusion that even if i disagreed with her most of her statements, i think it was important that people said the radical things so that we can question our own views and discover more about our own feminisms. a bit like how i don't like michael moore, but i am glad he makes those films as at least that way he encourages people to ask questions about what he is saying. i don't think women shuold fight men's battles on their behalf, we shouldn't be doing their protesting for them. but i hope so much that we can encourage men to see that feminism is about men too, and that together we can work to make this world better.
'Hasn't anybody ever told you a handful is enough?' by Samara Ginsberg
From Wren
Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!! the article 'Hasnt anyone told you a handful is enough' by Samara Ginsberg gave amazing perspective and really hit home for me. i hope her story can let others see what body criticism can do to a young woman.
Raising boys? Help yourself to some gender stereotypes, a review by Clare Gould
From LibraDog
Well said, Claire. I was given this book as a gift, and it really is a pile of misogynistic, male supremascist crap. Sadly, this is the sort of backlash conservatism that the masses want to believe, in the "Mars and Venus" mould. My advice: burn it and parent as a feminist. Your son will thank you for it in the long run.
From David
It seems a pointless task, but it does need to be pointed out that men and women to have intrinsic differences, and it is a sociological wrong of feminists to insist that their doctrine of 'no difference' is actually a source of conflict, not to mention downright arrogant. However, I dare say my foray into commenting on this site will be met with derision or sarcasm. A truth however, remains a truth and cannot be reconstructed to fit the feminist propaganda.
Why men should care about gender stereotypes, by Alex Gibson
From John
I was a feminist for many years a position that I found accepted by other men. Disappointingly I found women to be largely negative to me and my family as I took on the role as a single parent. It was assumed, by many women including my mother, that as a man encroaching on the female role I would fail miserably. I succeeded but that was due to calling on my 'feminine side'! The prejudice was appalling and I only just survived! Most women and men can't believe the dreadful inequality. I am no longer a feminist - women can look after themselves and sadly sometimes at the expense of men who care.
From Sarah Bee
Go Anna! Welcome to the sisterhoods of feminisms - happy growing, x.